I have been asked on more than one occasion to describe the most onerous aspect of being a writer. While the calling is certainly replete with all sorts of challenges that threaten one’s resolve every day, ultimately there is one truth of life as a writer that supersedes all others – the cruel and unforgiving reality that the creative mind never sleeps. It systematically rejects the call of somnolence and with indefatigable vitality spins filaments of ideas that reside in every corner of the brain, where they await, with restless anticipation, the day they may emerge from the artistic womb for all to experience and enjoy.
Alas, there is a reward for all of this restive toiling. When the labor is complete, there is certainly cause for joy and celebration. The discovery of new work by eager readers is a wonderful moment.
But for the writer, any real jubilance yields almost instantly to the evanescence triggered by the conception and eventual birth of the next idea – and the next – and the next…
So, a writer must adapt, learn to accept the physical fatigue that results from this somewhat aberrant nature of his or her existence. It’s not so bad. Clearly there are worse ways to live your life. Still, challenges abound. If a writer desires to also engage in the aspects of a conventional life, certain concessions have to be made in order to accommodate this alternative lifestyle. This requires a values triage – an assessment of those things that are essential to one’s well being and those which may be sacrificed for the greater good.
This was not easy for me at first.
I quit coaching the baseball team at the high school where I still teach when my older son, Nick, turned five years old. The reason? I didn’t want to miss anything that both my boys were doing. Thus, coaching both Nick and Anthony’s baseball teams, and attending every ice hockey game they played or any other event of which they were a part was non-negotiable. Also off the table was the time I spent every week with my parents, who were both ill for many years. They had done everything for me while I was growing up and I would not abandon them now. And of course, there was that whole teaching thing I was doing. Five classes of young minds who were counting on me to make their learning experience interesting or at the very least palatable had to remain a top priority.
This presented quite a quandary. There wasn’t much time left to nurture my budding artistic offspring.
Unable to resist the creative call, I carved out time from the remaining hours in my day. In addition to forgoing sleep, I often ate my meals on the run, resisted the allure of popular sitcoms and HBO dramas, and spent fewer hours with friends. Even my regular exercise routine had to be altered, something that resulted in the unintended acquisition of a few extra pounds. As I’m writing this I am smirking a bit over the somewhat delayed epiphany.
At the risk of belaboring the motif, doesn’t every pregnancy result in a little weight gain?
I first discovered this reality of life as a writer shortly after the publication of my first novel, ECHOES FROM THE INFANTRY.
Before I could even savor my first appearance at Barnes and Noble or enjoy the thoughtful messages from readers I had received, I was caught up in the tumult of another idea – one that had completely consumed me. It was an idea for a story about a very special baseball player – Mickey Tussler.
THE LEGEND OF MICKEY TUSSLER went on to receive wonderful reviews from both readers and professional organizations. I even received a call from Jason Koornick, Executive Producer at Eye In The Sky Entertainment in Los Angeles, California, whose inquiry about a film adaptation of the Mickey Tussler story soon became a hit television film and Netflix favorite “A Mile in His Shoes,” starring Dean Cain and Luke Schroder. There were speaking engagements, including The National Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, appearances at schools and libraries, radio interviews and many other unexpected accolades.
I was proud of Mickey, a feeling previously reserved only for Nick and Anthony.
But I felt an uneasiness - an ineffable force imploring me to resist complacency and pursue that which had yet to be acknowledged. I was pleased with all of the attention and praise for the book, but that pesky desire to just keep on writing would not allow for excessive celebration. What could I do but heed the call? I was already well into book two of the Mickey Tussler series and I was nurturing a handful of other ideas and projects. So I pressed on, unable to stop myself. The need to create was mastering, tantamount to the sweet song of the Sirens who would lure unwitting sailors to the jagged shoreline.
I was tired. But there was no rest for the weary.
I can still recall a family vacation to Hershey Park while I was in the midst of my creative tornado. It was before the age of portable electronic devices. I was enjoying the rides and other attractions with Nick and Anthony when without warning, I began having originative contractions. New ideas had risen to the surface without any discernible cause or provocation. I was seized by the terror of losing any of my unexpected inspiration. Unwilling to acquiesce to inconvenience, I raced frantically through the park, in search of something on which to record these ideas and of course a writing implement. The fact that I spent a good part of that same afternoon huddled behind the Cotton Candy/Funnel Cake booth scribbling on white napkins with a borrowed Bic pen was a testament to my affliction.
My fertility was at an all-time high. But so were my labor pains.
I was fully immersed in the sequel to the Mickey Tussler story, SOPHOMORE CAMPAIGN, as well as crafting a thriller NOBODY HAS TO KNOW, which were both released the same year.
That meant missing a few family barbecues and birthday parties as well as some impromptu invitations to grab drinks or something to eat with friends. Not everyone understood. And I had a difficult time explaining it. Few could grasp the notion that my need to create had robbed me as well of things I love. I hadn’t been to the movies (one of my favorite pastimes) in months. I couldn’t recall the last time I had hiked at Robert Moses State Park and I had missed more than a few Mets and Islanders games. I was aware of just how consuming my writer life had become. I vowed to change. I think perhaps I did, for a short time. But then whispering to me, ever so softly from somewhere in the deepest recesses of my mind, was the idea for a third Tussler book, WELCOME TO THE SHOW.
There was no postpartum depression. And the labors of love continued.
One may even argue they have intensified since. In the fall of 2017, while vacationing in Montauk with my family, I was asked by one of the founders of indie music producers MP Music House if I ever thought about writing lyrics. The question was flattering and definitely intriguing as well. But I was well into the writing of a memoir called I BECAME AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL OUTLAW and playing with an idea for a prequel to the Mickey Tussler trilogy. My time was already stretched alarmingly thin. I said no. I was already carrying quite a litter. I didn’t have room for another. So I remained focused on my time with my family, enjoying the surf and sand of one of my favorite places.
Then it happened. Again.
While hiking up and through the dunes at Hither Hills State Park, something stirred inside me. Like a tiny kick. I ignored it. Then it happened again. Thoughts of my parents flooded my mind. I found myself playing with words and arrangements while I walked. First came the chorus. Then the first verse. I was powerless to resist. In less than two hours, the first full song I had ever written, “Daddy Wrote The Music,” was born.
I was a proud papa. But I knew what this meant. There would be more to follow.
I cringed. This would require even more resolve now. I was going to have to try to navigate the creative waters that continued to swirl, a vortex of present and future projects that would undeniably leave me sleep deprived and inordinately time challenged and fatigued. It would not be easy. But I did not lament this latest challenge.
The fact is you’ll rarely hear me complain because if I were to be perfectly honest, I wouldn’t have it any other way. The joy of bringing an idea from its conception, through its infancy and finally to fruition is unlike any other. Everybody can sleep or kick back and relax. But so few of us get to savor the sweet taste of the creative process.
Some time ago, I heard an artist describe his talent as both “a blessing and a curse.” Initially, I found that to be a curious paradox. How could the force that brings you such joy also be the instrument of such vexation? It is only years later that I fully appreciate the veracity of that sentiment
There’s a price to be paid for creative work.
Frank Nappi
Frank Nappi is an American author, lyricist and high school English teacher.
Frank Nappi has taught high school English and Creative Writing for over thirty years. His debut novel, ECHOES FROM THE INFANTRY, received national attention, including MWSA’s silver medal for outstanding fiction. His follow-up novel, THE LEGEND OF MICKEY TUSSLER, garnered rave reviews as well, including a movie adaptation of the touching story “A Mile in His Shoes,” starring Dean Cain and Luke Schroder. Nappi continues to produce quality work, including SOPHOMORE CAMPAIGN, the intriguing sequel to the much-heralded original story, and the thriller, NOBODY HAS TO KNOW, which received an endorsement from #1 New York Times bestselling author Nelson DeMille. The third installment of Nappi’s Mickey Tussler series, WELCOME TO THE SHOW, was released in April 2016 and led to a musical adaptation of the award-winning series. “Buckle Up and Dig In” was released by MP Music House in September of 2017. Nappi collaborated on the writing of the song and after signing with MP Music House, has written the lyrics for several original songs, including multiple pieces for breakout artists Atticus Jones and Tom Petrone. Nappi’s latest work, I BECAME AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL OUTLAW is a poignant, humorous memoir that chronicles Nappi’s elementary school days and the impact they still have on him many years later. Nappi makes his home on Long Island, where he has lived his entire life. For more information about Frank Nappi and his work, please visit the author’s website – www.franknappi.com
G&E In Motion does not necessarily agree with the opinions of our guest bloggers. That would be boring and counterproductive. We have simply found the author’s thoughts to be interesting, intelligent, unique, insightful, and/or important. We may not agree on the words but we surely agree on their right to express them and proudly present this platform as a means to do so.